Book Club – I’m Thinking About Dating Again


Lifestyle / Friday, March 23rd, 2018

This months book club theme is “I’m thinking about dating again”, you can look forward to several great books that focus on romance for you adults. Usually, I include a section for kids books, but considering the topic and material I am going to discuss, I thought maybe it is not so appropriate this month. I hope you check out and enjoy some of these great books. If you’re looking for great kid book recommendations, check out our book club archive here.

I’m Thinking About Dating Again

Dating after separating from a long term partner is a different process for everyone. Some people go out right away and try to find the next spark of romance. For myself, it has been a long process, much due to my last relationship. It’s officially been 1 year and 6 months since I left my husband, and I think I am starting to want to date again.

I’m in no means in any rush to get out there, I haven’t gone on a date in 5 years and I’ve got no idea what to do. Thinking about it, I married my first boyfriend, so I’ve really got no clue how to go about this. I didn’t realize I was even ready to start dating until I looked at my reading record list in my bullet journal and realized I had more and more books themed towards romance and relationships.

Let’s call this my pre-dating prep phase. Because knowledge is power to me and I hate being thrown into something without at least a bit of information to work with. I know you can’t truly prepare for dating, but I can get into the mindset and read some great books along the way to make me laugh, think and be inspired to get back into the dating world.

Getting back out there in the world and thinking about dating again has been an emotional and scary experience, but after reading these books I found that I was really excited about dating again. I’m more than ready to have fun, make memories and maybe even get laid. Yeah, I said it.

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Modern Romance by Aziz Ansari

I know Aziz Ansari as an actor and comedian. I was in the dark place last month and was looking for some laughs in any way I could manage to grab one. So when I saw Aziz’s book was available to download on my Library Audiobook app, I hit borrow and download instantly thinking this was an easy laugh.

When the book started and Aziz introduced himself I started washing the dishes and was surprised to hear him start talking about dating, romance, and Tinder. I wasn’t interested in dating, in fact, I knew for a fact that no one would want to date someone broken like me. But I stuck with the book because Aziz is hilarious and he is very intellectual.

The entire book is a study of modern romance, hence the title of the book. Aziz explores everything from how we find a partner, feel about them, keep one, get rid of one… and it’s hilariously written. I loved that I was learning real facts and data collected by legitimate research while having a good time.

This is the book that made me realize that dating is supposed to be fun, and everyone is going to feel awkward. This is the book that made me want to have fun and experience dating again. I recommend if you want to have a good laugh and learn about Modern Romance, this isn’t just to inspire those who haven’t dated in years.

Or anyone, really. It’s a great book, and out of all on the list, I’d suggest you experience this one. Oh, did I mention Aziz reads this book if you listen via audiobook?

book club recommendations for those who are getting back into dating after a hiatus, get into the romancing mood!
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Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

A classic. I’ve decided I want to start reading classics and re-reading novels I read in high school. Because if I’m being honest with myself, I was young, immature, and not really enjoying being forced to read a book. Jane Austen is my first stop on my classic reading list and she did not disappoint.

Pride and Prejudice is set in an era where women had no rights. In fact, their entire standard of life depended on a man. A father, a husband, or if she had neither of those, she would hope another family member would take her in. It was not an easy time for women, yet the era is romanticized like crazy. Believe me, there are aspects that I would love to live and experience as well. But I love my century.

Having seen both the movie and TV series adaptations of this book, I knew it was about to time to read it and I enjoyed the book quite a lot. Each version has its pros and cons, but the book you cannot go wrong with if you’re ever going to experience a version of Pride and Prejudice. Which is why it is in the book club.

Also, after reading this book a great version of Pride and Prejudice movie to watch is Austen Land. Set in modern day, it’s hilarious and a great rom/com. Totally enjoyable to watch without reading the book as well.

book club recommendations for those who are getting back into dating after a hiatus, get into the romancing mood!
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Sex from Scratch by Sarah Mirk

I found this book after realizing I maybe, perhaps, wanted to have sex again. Okay okay, I read this knowing I really wanted to get laid. What? I’m human, we all have needs. Clearly, it’s been a long time and, as Izzie Stevens put it, the beast is waking up and is hungry.

Sex from Scratch is a great book that offers interesting perspectives on relationships. Touching slightly on being single, and more on being married, gender, being feminist, being in a relationship, non/monogamy, saying no, choosing to be childless, knowing when to split up and how to end a relationship. So many topics and they are all presented in a way that kept me open to the different ideas. I imagined myself in each type of scenario presented and got an idea of what I wanted from a future relationship.

This was a quick read, quicker if you audiobook it like I did. Both entertaining and insightful exploring the different options when it comes to relationships while normalizing it all. My perspective of different kinds of romance and relationships and sexual choices has shifted, which is why I highly recommend this book. If not to re-evaluate your own life and romance, but to understand a loved one that maybe you haven’t yet found peace with their style of love, romance and sexual choices.

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Girl with a Lower Back Tattoo by Amy Schumer

Once again another book that I sought out specifically for a laugh. Comedians are great self-care for me and can guarantee a mood lift when I am feeling down. Amy Schumer isn’t my favourite female comedian, but she’s definitely earned her fair share of my gut-busting laugh sessions.

This book is a collection of Amy’s life experiences. She talks about work, family, and romance. Again, I listened to this via audiobook and got to experience the book how it was written, in the voice of Amy Schumer. Literally, this is the best way to experience any book. I highly recommend listening to audiobooks if it is read by the author.

Throughout the book, Amy reminded me that life is going to be messy, and you’ve just got to laugh at yourself. That way, if other people laugh at you, you don’t care so much. She’s also an introvert, so I trust her words, she understands the struggle of being around people. Amy shares hilarious dating and sex stories that made me laugh and kind of look forward to awkward sexual encounters in the future. And that doesn’t make me a slut, I don’t have to have a one night stand… well, maybe just one really epic one would be okay.

Before You Go

That’s my short book recommendation list for those, like me, have been out of the dating game for a while and are ready to suit up and go out. Dating is fun, and reading these books totally got me ready to get out there and experience life again after abuse. Each of these books I read without the intention of dating, but after reading them all I realized I was preparing myself for some future romancing. And it’s pretty exciting.

If you want to read more on my journey to start dating again, check out last weeks blog post featuring my thoughts on dating after Domestic Abuse. I get real and talk about my fears, anxiety and straight up worries about dating again. Regardless of my fears, I’m still putting on a fancy dress and going to dinner. Watch out world, Katrina is back on the market.

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